okay this is just an entry relating to a email i got forwarded to me… if you never went to high school in Christchurch, don’t bother reading any further, its just not funny unless you know…<\/p>\n
HOW MANY CHRISTCHURCH SCHOOL STUDENTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?<\/p>\n
Rangi Ruru- One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.<\/p>\n
Hornby High- Two. One to change the bulb and one to figure out how to get high off the old one.<\/p>\n
St Bedes – None. They’re all too drunk to notice and even when they’re sober if they spot a hole they just put there willy in it.<\/p>\n
Girls High – One. She’ll put through a call to maintenance staff because there’s no way she’s going to do manual labour.<\/p>\n
Hillmorton – None. That hole looks better in the dark.<\/p>\n
Riccarton – Six. One to change it but only after the other five have found an interpreter to translate the English instructions. <\/p>\n
Burnside High – Seventy six. One to change the globe. Fifty to protest the globe’s right not to change and twenty five to stage a counter protest.<\/p>\n
St Andrews- None. Those poor bastards are keeping their backs to the wall even if it means standing in the dark. “If you can’t get a girl, get a Christ boy”.<\/p>\n
Avonside – Five. One to change it, two to make sure her hair ribbons are still in place and another two to make sure her bag looks cool at all times.<\/p>\n
Linwood High -Six. Four to break into the store, one to steal the globe and one to install it.<\/p>\n
Villa Maria – None. It is too unsafe for pregnant girls to attempt such a dangerous task.<\/p>\n
Papanui High – 10. One to change the bulb. One to call their dealer and eight to have a session why they wait.<\/p>\n
Aranui High – None. Everything not welded down had been flogged long ago.<\/p>\n
Hagley – None. Everyone is either suspended or bunking (including the teachers).<\/p>\n
Boys High – Two, one to change the bulb and one to make the observation that it isn’t half as bright as the light shining from their arses.<\/p>\n
Marian – None. They only have to give head to the Shirley boys and its done for them.<\/p>\n
Rangiora High – None. Electricity has yet to make it out that far.<\/p>\n
St Thomas’s- Four. One to change the bulb, three to count how many times he mentions rugby and fucking someones mother.<\/p>\n
After a most excellent start to the semester Fran gets very sick… not sure where to lay blame for this ill feeling, but methinks that going to both nights of of a certain band cannot have helped…actually neither could going to Matterhorn with Grant, Simon, James, and Nick, or going out with Francine and Abby….hmmmm well I am sure its not that bad, and yes it was a busy week… my 104 assignment is unfortunately falling behind as a result, which pisses me off somewhat cause it was looking so promising before I ended up in bed
\nI have been working hard out at uni… barely getting enough sleep, and thus, i guess this could be another thing to blame my sickness on, like i have stayed in my bed for 6 days without getting up at all…. its awful, and therefore I ended up with a huge back log of assignments to complete…. which was insane.. now i have ended up with only one weeks holidays cause i am spending the first week of my holidays in at uni completing these assignments…..
\nwell other than the sick and lack of sleep i haven’t been up to too much….
\nsitting in bed does that to you…. although now i can claim to be an expert in Oprah’s sense of dress (incidentally.. she has been wearing a lot of pastel suits lately … and they aren’t flattering…)
\n…. yes… that and my ability to watch an amazing amount of Melrose place and infomercials…. oh dear I have become very sad…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
okay this is just an entry relating to a email i got forwarded to me… if you never went to high school in Christchurch, don’t bother reading any further, its just not funny unless you know…<\/p>\n
HOW MANY CHRISTCHURCH SCHOOL STUDENTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?<\/p>\n
Rangi Ruru- One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.<\/p>\n
Hornby High- Two. One to change the bulb and one to figure out how to get high off the old one.<\/p>\n
St Bedes – None. They’re all too drunk to notice and even when they’re sober if they spot a hole they just put there willy in it.<\/p>\n